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Love and Marriage

by Dee Bowman

Times change.  In the 1950's Frank Sinatra sang what everybody - at least most everybody believed.

"Love and marriage,
Love and marriage
Go together like a horse and carriage.
Dad was told by mother, you can't have one without the other."

That lyric is the physical expression of a spiritual truth.  Whatever happened to that concept?  Is it no longer true or is it that it has been eroded in the wake of the loose morals of our culture?  Is there no longer any need to have love as the basis for marriage and the bond which holds it in place after it is consummated?  And does society make the rules for marriage?

God Put Love and Marriage Together.  In the beginning, when he had made man and woman for one another He said, "For this cause shall a man leave his father and mother and cleave to his wife." Jesus said, "...what therefore God hath joined together, let not man put asunder (Matthew 19:9). Society is the result of marriage, not the cause of it.  Marriage is a sacred vow between two people and God and it has nothing whatever to do with what society says about it.  And it's based on love - love by the husband for his wife and love by the wife for her husband.

Divorce Is Sinful.  Sin is some way involved in every divorce.  One party may be innocent, both parties may be guilty; but sin is a causative factor in every divorce.  Society places no social stigma on divorce for any cause.  Divorce is rampant, almost popular in some places.  Society's "stars" have nearly all been divorced and remarried several times.  Take Elizabeth Taylor for an example.  She has had eight husbands.  And yet people still adore, almost revere her.  It's a sad testimony to our times that our culture has so lost its connection to God that it looks the other way when it comes to God's marriage laws, when it "puts light for darkness and darkness for light" (Isaiah 5:20).

God's Marriage Laws Are As Old As Man.  They antedate the church by many hundreds of years.  There is no reason that I'm aware of to assume they have ever changed.  True, Moses was lenient about them for a time, but Jesus said, "from the beginning it was not so." When a person commits adultery, it is adultery whether or not he ever heard of the church.  Paul told the Corinthians that "neither fornicators, nor idolaters, nor adulterers, nor effeminate, nor abusers of themselves with mankind ... shall inherit the kingdom of God.  And such were some of you." They were idolaters because idolatry has always been wrong whether or not they had ever heard of the church.  They were drunkards because drunkenness has always been sinful.  And they were fornicators, adulterers, homosexuals whether or riot they had ever heard of the church.

Society's Loose Views on Divorce and Remarriage Is the Cause of Many Different Problems.  The family, the structural essence of society, has been fragmented by these loose views.  Fathers have little to do with the family in today's world; they have lost their way and have neglected their role as spiritual head of the family.  Mothers have left the home and are there, riot as the maternal stabilizers of the home, but only long enough to put On new makeup so as to go out into the world and pursue careers of far less importance and value than that of motherhood or "keepers at home." Children, in many homes, govern the family.  They decide what is to be watched, listened to, worn, where to go and when.  In some homes mothers have become little more than taxi drivers so that the little people can participate in competitive sports-and at such an early age that by the time they are old enough to be proficient at some sport, they are burned out from too much competition.

Homes are not homes in many places; they are houses, places where people stay for a while each day to sleep and eat.  There is no hearth, no family gathering, no together time.  Some families go for weeks at a time without any real connection, much less any family prayer, worship, or Bible reading.  The fragmented family is one of the devil's most effective stratagems.

What to do?  Well, it's actually so simple that it's apt to be overlooked.  Get the family together.  Read the Bible.  Every family would do well to have at least one time each day where the whole family is together for at least an hour or so-and with the TV, stereo, or radio turned off.  You might find out it's fun.  You might get to know one another and thereby break down some of the barriers that have resulted from a lack of association.  Family fun is some of the finest fun.

A family that worships together is less apt to have troubles.  The common bond to God brings them closer together, forming mutual protection against inordinate outside influences.  Their common worship binds them to a common goal and causes them to love one another even more.  It just makes sense for the family to get together... It's God's plan for you to do so; it's the devil's plan for you not to.  Which will you follow?  And remember, "love and marriage, love and marriage..." 

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